Standing Up Against Harm
In this activity, children will use doll play or puppet play to explore scenarios in which a character experiences exclusion or another form of harm—and then problem-solve ways to respond assertively.
Step 1: Gather materials.
- This activity can involve role-play with dolls, figures or puppets, but it does not require any of these.
Step 2: Introduce activity.
- Children provide many opportunities to address emotions throughout the day, and the early childhood years are a critical time to build their awareness of their own feelings and those of other children.
- Part of creating an environment where children support and stand up for one another involves releasing some of our control and teaching them to problem-solve through difficult situations and conflict. Consider what you want children to learn. If you want to teach empathy, kindness and caring for others, then you will need to support the children as they learn about and practice these behaviors.
- Walk alongside the children and help them navigate complex situations rather than lecturing them about how to behave.
- You can introduce the topic of standing up against bias in two different ways:
- Initiate discussions during small-group or large-group times.
- Use real-life incidents as opportunities to teach these skills as you help the children solve problems related to bias.
Step 3: Engage children in activity.
- Take advantage of naturally occuring opportunities throughout the day to teach the children how to push back against hurtful acts and then support and reinforce their attempts to do so.
- With younger children, this involves noticing, narrating, and providing feedback about simple acts of sympathy or emerging social skills.
- With older children, introduce and support behaviors associated with allyship more directly.
- If teaching these skills more directly: Initiate small-group or large-group discussions about scenarios involving unkindness or injustice.
- Solicit ideas about how to respond to unkindness or injustice and then offer suggestions of your own. Tailor your suggested responses to the children's level of knowledge and experience. For suggestions, refer to our Adaptations by Age section below.
Adaptations by age
Infants and toddlers
- When engaging in pretend play with infants and toddlers, we typically root our interactions in the multisensory activities that young children enjoy. However, even the youngest children give toys to one another, share space and express shared joy with peers. By noticing and narrating these prosocial behaviors, you can help build the foundations of friendship and peer support.
- For example, you might say:
- “You are playing together so nicely.”
- “You gave her your toy. What a good friend you are!”
- “They’re feeling sad. It’s so nice of you to give them a hug.”
Two-year-olds
- As you support the social-emotional development of two-year-olds, you can continue to lay the foundation for allyship behaviors as part of your anti-bias practice. For example:
- Support the children's efforts to communicate their boundaries to one another by suggesting that they say: “If you don’t like something, say 'I don't like that!'"
- Use simple "if/then" statements such as: “If you see someone get hurt, say STOP and get the teacher.”
- Act out everyday problems with dolls and puppets to see how the children respond.
- Calmly and supportively state a problem that a child has experienced. For example, you might say, "When she pushed you, it made you feel very scared." Then explore solutions with the child or children involved.
Preschoolers
- Once the children reach preschool age, you can build on your efforts to teach social skills such as problem-solving by involving the children more in the process.
- Introduce different scenarios and discuss them with the children. Scenarios could include a child who is not invited to play with the other children or children who are excluded based on their gender. Explore how this might make a child feel and how the children might prevent something like this from occurring.
- Review real-life problems with the children and explore how they were solved. To generate new ideas, ask: “So, if this happens again, what should you do?” This exercise might include a variety of scenarios in which a person harms another person through exclusion, unkind words, hitting, or other hurtful actions.
- Involve the children in conversations about how they can be good friends and allies by:
- Recognizing when someone is being harmed. (Discuss what that looks like and how these behaviors make the children feel.)
- Speaking out when they see someone being harmed (Discuss what the children should say, such as "Stop, they don't like that." or "You shouldn't do that.”)
- Calling a grownup over. (Discuss how to ask for help.)
Suggested books
- Visit our Inclusive Children’s Books section and click on the Books That Inspire Children to be Better Friends and Allies button to find books that inspire children to be more emotionally aware, empathetic and supportive—qualities that will enable them to be better allies for friends and classmates in need.
- NOTE: If examples of harm are the only context in which diversity is acknowledged or addressed in the classroom, children are at risk of learning more about harmful behaviors and associating harm with diversity. Instead, we want children to see, experience and navigate the reality of a complex and diverse world—and engage with many different positive representations of diverse people and families. The books featured in our Inclusive Children's Books section have been carefully selected to support this goal.
What Illinois Early Learning Guideline does this meet for children from birth to age three?
Developmental DomainSocial-Emotional Development
Standard: EmpathyChildren demonstrate an emerging ability to understand someone else’s feelings and to share in the emotional experiences of others.
Indicators for children:
- Begins to share in simple emotions by reading facial and gestural cues, e.g., repeats activities that make others laugh. (Birth–9 months)
- Uses social referencing with caregiver(s) in uncertain situations, e.g., glances at a caregiver’s face for cues on how to respond to an unfamiliar person or new situation. (7–18 months)
- Reacts to a child who is upset by observing or moving physically closer to the child. (7–18 months)
- Shares in both positive and negative emotions with caregiver(s), e.g., shares in wonders, amazement, delight, and disappointment. (7–18 months)
- Imitates comforting behaviors from caregiver(s), e.g., pats or hugs a child when upset. (16–24 months)
- Demonstrates awareness of different emotions and feelings during play, e.g., rocks a baby doll and whispers “shhh.” (16–24 months)
- Shares in and communicates simple emotions of others, e.g., “mama sad”, “papa happy.” (16–24 months)
- Communicates how other children may be feeling and why, e.g., states that a peer is sad because his or her toy was taken away. (21–36 months)
- Responds to a child in distress in an attempt to make that child feel better, e.g., gives a crying child a hug, uses soothing words, or uses distraction. (21–36 months)
- Shares in and shows an emotional response for peers’ feelings, e.g., may show concern for a child who is hurt or smile for a child who is happy and jumping up and down. (21–36 months)
What Illinois Early Learning and Development Standards does this meet for preschoolers?
Social/Emotional Development Standard30AIdentify and manage one’s emotions and behavior.
Benchmark 30.A.ECf:
Begin to understand the consequences of his or her behavior.
Social/Emotional Development Standard31ADevelop positive relationships with peers and adults.
Benchmark 31.A.ECa:
Show empathy, sympathy, and caring for others.
Benchmark 31.A.ECb:
Recognize the feelings and perspectives of others.
Benchmark 31.A.ECe:
Develop positive relationships with peers.
Social/Emotional Development Standard31BUse communication and social skills to interact effectively with others.
Benchmark 31.B.ECc:
Use socially appropriate behavior with peers and adults, such as helping, sharing, and taking turns.
Social/Emotional Development Standard32ABegin to consider ethical, safety and societal factors in making decisions.
Benchmark 32.A.ECb:
Follow rules and make good choices about behavior.